Today was one of both highs and lows. I find it hard at the moment to even want to share the highs as my heart is broken. I keep writing things and erasing them, not sure what to say, and yet I feel I must.
We started out this morning really early in fact. We had gotten up with time to spare before church. Arriving early enough to visit and show off Ariel's improving walking abilities, when she wasn't hiding behind my skirt.
After church we had a quick lunch and headed into Vancouver to visit Bonita, a animation friend from L.A. She has been friends with Ken for many years through the school and I got to know her while I was there too. She has been waiting to see Ariel since last year, so we finally made it out while she was in town.
We went down to English Bay for a walk and Ariel's first time experiencing the beach. She loved it! I can't describe the moments watching her discover the water, the feeling of the sand, it was all new and so breathtaking. Although, Bonita has been struggling with illness, she is still full of life to me and so kind. It was wonderful to see her. I think she was honoured to be witness to one of Ariel's big firsts. Here are some of those moments.
As we drove home, the radio was playing great songs and we felt so alive. I didn't say it out loud, because I know Ken most likely knew what I would say... it felt like the day we took the drive together to unwind... the one that became known as the day my mom died. Sadly, this day was about to take a very similar turn.
We got home and in a whim of spontaneous nature, we went to the last 20 minutes of the market. Got a cute bird made from rock and some little donuts for Ken. We walked home, soaking up the last of the weekend sun, and got in the house. As I unloaded Ariel's things, I noticed the phone message... it was from my friend Cindy, and I could tell something wasn't right.
I called and sure enough, my fears were confirmed. Our friend Gwen's mom had been killed in a car accident over the weekend. I just slumped into a chair with my head in my hands. Everything gets blurry in a moment like this. Its too familiar... its shocking... and its not fair. She was a wonderful and kind woman, and wonderful wife to Gwen's dad and mother to Gwen, her brother Brad and sister Jill. As with my mom, she is gone too soon and although I have travelled this road before, it doesn't make it any easier. I pray for them and the extended family. To Gwen, I love you and I am here for you. I am sorry... so sorry.
I wrapped Ariel in a special blanket as I sat, and had a moment before coming here to type... it was made by Gwen's mom. A precious gift made with her hands, heart and time. I will treasure this gift to my daughter forever. Thank you.